What good listeners do

Via First Among Equals, from The Trusted Advisor, what good listeners do:

1. Probe for clarification
2. Listen for unvoiced emotions
3. Listen for the story
4. Summarize well
5. Empathize
6. Listen for what's different, not for what's familiar
7. Take it all seriously (don't say, "you shouldn't worry about that")
8. Spot hidden assumptions
9. Let the other person "get it out of his or her system"
10. Ask, "How do you feel about that?"
11. Keep the other person talking ("What else have you considered?")
12. Keep asking for more detail that helps to understand
13. Get rid of distractions while listening
14. Focus on hearing their version first
15. Let them tell their story their way
16. Stand in their shoes, at least while listening
17. Ask them how they think you might be of help
18. Ask what they've thought of before telling them what you've thought of
19. Look at (not stare at) the person as s/he speaks
20. Look for "congruency" (or incongruity) between what the person says and how s/he gestures and postures
21. Make it seem as if the other person is the only thing that matters and that they have all the time in the world
22. Encourage by nodding head or giving a slight smile
23. Show awareness and control of body movement (no moving around, shaking legs, fiddling with a paper clip)